When someone is having a tough time trying to conceive, it can create a lot of stress not just for them, but for their friends and family as well. People often mean well but might unintentionally say something that feels insensitive or intrusive. So, what’s the best way to support a loved one facing infertility?
In a recent interview, Dr. Lila Thompson, a reproductive endocrinologist, shared some thoughtful advice on how to approach these delicate conversations.
Reach Out Thoughtfully
Dr. Thompson emphasizes the importance of simply being there. A simple message like, “Hey, I’m thinking of you today,” can mean a lot. It’s crucial to tread lightly—infertility is a deeply personal topic. If your friend shares how they’re feeling, great. But if they say they’re “fine,” let it go. Respect their space and allow them to open up when they’re ready.
Avoid Minimizing Their Experience
It can be easy to say something like, “At least you already have one child,” but that can come off as dismissive. Dr. Thompson reminds us that whether someone has zero kids or several, dealing with infertility is painful and should be acknowledged.
Validate Their Feelings
Sometimes, all someone needs to hear is that their feelings are valid. When things don’t go as hoped—like a failed IVF cycle—Dr. Thompson suggests saying, “I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I know it hurts.” Just acknowledging their pain can provide comfort without needing to say much else.
Skip the Unsolicited Advice
Phrases like “Just relax, and it will happen” can feel frustrating to someone struggling to conceive. Instead of offering advice, it’s better to listen. As one parent shared, well-meaning advice can often feel out of touch and doesn’t address the real emotional struggle that comes with infertility.
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In summary, supporting someone with infertility requires sensitivity, respect, and an open heart. Being present, validating their feelings, and steering clear of unsolicited advice can make a significant difference during this challenging journey.