When it comes to a newborn, it’s hard to resist the urge to cuddle and coo. However, as much as we appreciate the affection, we’re not exactly keen on having anyone’s germy hands all over our little ones. So, I took to social media and asked for some clever and polite ways to communicate, “please don’t touch my baby!” Here’s what I found:
- Doctor’s Orders
“This is baby [insert name]. Just a heads up, the pediatrician says no touching from new friends just yet, so we’ll stick to waving for now!” - Babywearing
“I like to wear my baby in a carrier to deter grabby hands. Plus, I can easily cover them with a blanket for extra protection.” - Quick Evade
“I spotted someone reaching for the stroller and swiftly moved away. Not today!” - Feet Only, Please
“In my culture, there’s a belief called ‘Mal de ojo.’ If you want to touch the baby but can’t, you might make them sick. I usually suggest touching their feet instead.” - The Biting Trick
“I shout, ‘Careful, she bites!’ and quickly move the stroller away. It usually gets a laugh and we’re on our way.” - Assume Hygiene
“As they reach for the baby, I ask, ‘You’ve washed your hands, right?’” - Water Spray Defense
“I keep a spray bottle handy. A firm ‘NO’ along with a quick squirt can stop grabby hands in their tracks!” - Just Look
“At my older kid’s daycare, the teacher told the kids: ‘We only look at babies with our eyes!’” - Put the Pressure On
“I say, ‘Please don’t touch him, it’s cold/flu season. I wouldn’t want you to feel guilty if he got sick.’” - Fake Illness
“I often say, ‘Sorry, she has a rash/illness, and it’s contagious.’” - Simple No
“Sometimes, just a straightforward ‘no thanks’ is all you need.” - Newborn Bubble
“With my third baby, I say, ‘Please don’t touch, he’s still in his newborn bubble!’ while gesturing with my hands.” - Be Direct
“I simply say, ‘Please don’t put your hands on my clean baby.’” - Vaccination Status
“I mention, ‘Oh, she’s not up to date on her shots yet—want to keep everyone safe!’” - We Aren’t Touchers
“I tell them, ‘Oh, we aren’t touchers.’” - No Petting Zone
“I say, ‘She’s an emotional support baby… no petting allowed!’” - Make It Awkward
“Start touching the other person’s face and make it weird. That should do the trick!” - Fake Cold
“I say he’s recovering from a cold even if he’s perfectly fine.” - Skip the Guilt
“Once, I instinctively pushed a stranger’s hand away from my baby. Later, I thought about how she was doing the same to my child!” - Jazz Hands Only
“I say, ‘Jazz hands only, please!’ and do a little demo. It usually gets a chuckle.” - Rabid Baby
“I joke, ‘This one’s rabid!’” - Undercover Baby
“Cover the car seat with a stretchy cover or wear the baby in a carrier. It makes people less likely to reach out.” - Toddler Defense
“My cousin taught her toddler to bark at anyone trying to touch the baby. It worked wonders!” - Just Say No
“I’ve learned that ‘no’ is a complete sentence. No need to sugarcoat it when your baby’s health is at stake.” - Keep It Real
“I personally prefer, ‘don’t freaking touch my baby.’” - Stroller Signs
“I attached signs to the stroller that say, ‘I’m fragile, please don’t touch me.’ It often gets the message across without awkwardness.”
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In summary, communicating boundaries with a sense of humor and directness can help protect your baby while maintaining social decorum. Whether it’s through a quirky excuse or a firm statement, you can ensure that your little one stays safe and sound.