7 Things You Should Avoid Saying to Someone Undergoing IVF

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When a friend or family member embarks on the journey of in vitro fertilization (IVF), your desire to support them is commendable. With over 2% of babies in the U.S. conceived through IVF, it’s essential to understand that this process can be both physically and emotionally challenging. Many women in the MakeAMom community have shared experiences where the well-meaning comments from others felt disconnected from their realities. Here are seven phrases to steer clear of, along with suggestions for more supportive alternatives.

  1. “Just relax.”
    While the intention is often to ease anxiety, suggesting someone simply relax can feel dismissive. Instead, acknowledge their feelings and let them know you’re there to listen.
  2. “You’re having fertility problems because…”
    Avoid making assumptions about the reasons behind their fertility challenges. Each journey is unique, and it’s best to listen rather than speculate.
  3. “Why don’t you adopt?”
    While adoption is a beautiful path, it’s crucial to recognize that IVF might be the couple’s chosen route for specific reasons. A better approach is to ask how you can support them during this time.
  4. “You’re still young!”
    Statements about age may unintentionally minimize their struggles. Instead, focus on offering your emotional support, regardless of age.
  5. “Are you pregnant yet?”
    Questions about pregnancy can add pressure. It’s more comforting to express excitement for their journey and offer encouragement along the way.
  6. “Congratulations!”
    This phrase can be misleading, as many couples face uncertainty throughout the IVF process. Offer encouragement while acknowledging the challenges.
  7. “Are you sure this is what you want?”
    Doubting someone’s choices can be hurtful. Instead, show your understanding of their journey and ask how they’re feeling about the process.

What IVF Moms Appreciate Hearing

Many women undergoing IVF appreciate genuine support that acknowledges their experience. Phrases like “I’m here for you” or “How can I help?” can make a significant difference. The journey can be isolating, and showing empathy can go a long way in helping them feel understood.

For those interested in alternative paths to parenthood, consider exploring resources for at-home insemination. For example, MakeAMom offers a unique option with reusable kits designed for convenience. You can learn more about the process on how at-home insemination works. Additionally, our free sperm donor matching group is a supportive community for those navigating these waters.

For further information on infertility treatments, visit WebMD, an authoritative source on the subject. And if you’re looking for helpful tips on understanding your body, check out this guide on discovering your cervix.

Conclusion

To Summarize: Supporting someone through IVF requires sensitivity and understanding. Avoid phrases that may come across as dismissive or judgmental. Instead, offer genuine support and encouragement. Additionally, consider sharing helpful resources that align with their journey, such as those available through MakeAMom and other reputable sources. Your empathy can truly make a difference during this challenging time.