The Seven Stages of Shopping at Target with Kids

  1. Denial
    I need to run to Target. I have a child. We can totally manage this! It won’t be like the last time—or the time before that! We’ll go in for just the essentials: toilet paper and milk. No tears this time, from either of us. This trip will be different.
  2. Anger
    Why is this happening again? Why do I have kids who can’t handle a simple shopping trip without losing it? This is ridiculous. I can’t even with my children right now.
  3. Bargaining
    What if we just stick to the Dollar Spot? You can choose anything from there! Fine, TWO toys! A glow stick and a pail! Or maybe some stickers and a Cars pen! Awesome, right? Want some candy? Sure! M&Ms it is! Cookies? Why not? I’ll do anything to avoid a meltdown.
  4. Guilt
    What did I do to deserve a child like this? Was it the formula? The pacifier? The co-sleeping? Am I not giving enough affection? What am I doing wrong???
  5. Depression
    I must be the worst parent ever. I’ll never be able to take my kids anywhere again. This is just awful.
  6. Acceptance
    Alright, fine! Just grab a toy from the aisle. You win, I lose. There goes my fun money for the week. Here, take your toy. Happy now? At least one of us is.
  7. Regret
    Why did I allow that? What was I thinking? Lesson learned, again. Kids and Target do not mix. Never again, I mean it this time.

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And then, the inevitable moment arrives. Did I just forget the toilet paper again?

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In summary, navigating Target with children can be a chaotic experience filled with ups and downs, from denial to regret. Proper planning and a bit of creativity can make the trip somewhat manageable, but it’s always a challenge.