As I navigate my 40s, it seems there’s a rigid narrative about how we’re expected to change—short hair, no more mini skirts, and more kale. But there’s a vibrant middle ground that often gets overlooked. This gray area is where we women blossom: perhaps we embrace a bit more sass, enjoy our intimate lives more fully, and dare to wear bold lipstick. We grow into our true selves.
Reflecting on a decade ago, I recall working alongside a group of women in their 30s at an after-school program for kids in need. We were all from varied backgrounds—some married, some engaged, and none of us parents. We were passionate and determined. One day, Justin Timberlake’s “SexyBack” blared through the office, prompting a colleague, Sarah, to exclaim, “I might be too old for Top 40, but I love this song!” Her words resonated with everyone, but they left me pondering: Can we really be “too old” for music? Since when do age limits dictate what resonates with us?
Some things transcend age and ignite that inner spark of sexiness. For instance, I have a simple T-shirt that, while unremarkable, fits perfectly and accentuates all the right places. It makes me feel stunning—even on my worst days.
Here are a few elements that elevate my confidence and beauty, irrespective of age:
- A Crisp White Shirt
Whether it’s a classic button-down or a casual tee, a white shirt embodies effortless style. Growing up during the era of Ralph Lauren and Bruce Springsteen, it feels timeless and sexy to me. - My Favorite Jeans
A few years ago, I splurged on a pair of jeans that fit like a dream. Slightly distressed with well-placed pockets, they scratched my ’80s itch for glam while making me feel fabulous. - The Black Crowes’ ‘Hard to Handle’
This song gets me every time! “Hey little thing let me light your candle…” I may misremember some lyrics, but that doesn’t stop me from belting it out and feeling ageless. - A Good Hair Day
There’s something magical about those days when my hair cooperates, whether it’s soft curls or sleek strands. It can turn an ordinary day into something special. - Painted Toenails
It’s amazing how a splash of color on my toes can brighten my mood. It’s a small yet meaningful way to treat myself without needing anyone else’s approval. - Next-Day Vibes
A college roommate once claimed that your hair looks amazing the day after intimacy. While I’m not sure about that theory, it certainly applies to the secret, satisfied glances my partner and I share after a night of connection.
Embracing the things that make us feel beautiful and alive is essential, regardless of age. I refuse to let societal standards define what is “appropriate” for me. I must admit, though, I’m starting to appreciate a good kale smoothie.
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In summary, there are countless elements that can make us feel attractive and fulfilled at any age. Let’s embrace what makes us feel alive without the constraints of age-related expectations.