Hello everyone, it’s me, Dad. I’m sharing this post with you because, well, let’s face it—you can’t read yet, you have no clue what a blog is, and you’re still in that delightful stage where you believe everything I say without question.
Lucky me!
I have a stash of secrets, things that could shake my authority if you ever discovered them. Here are ten confidential tidbits that I’ll likely carry to my grave… or at least until you have little ones of your own.
- TV Time is My Reward, Not Yours. You might wonder why I don’t promise you extra TV for good behavior. Well, when you’re being delightful, there’s no need for a distraction. But when the chaos of toddlerhood hits—crying, whining, fighting—that’s when I turn to our trusty TV. Those precious moments of “Yo Gabba Gabba” are my little treat for surviving the storm. Here’s a secret: if you ever want more screen time, maybe act out a little. When I set up a “movie day,” it often means you’ve been a handful. But don’t catch on to that; I need my tricks to work!
- While You Nap, I Indulge. You probably don’t see me munching much, right? It’s not because I’m some kind of superhero who doesn’t need food (though that’s a fun thought!). I try to model good eating habits for you both, but while you’re dreaming, I dive into a mountain of chocolate chip cookies. I also indulge in TV marathons from the comfort of my couch, sitting as close to the screen as I please.
- Your Tears Get Me Every Time. I don’t know where it comes from, but you both could win awards for your performances. Those dramatic tears are powerful! Even when I suspect you’re putting on a show, I often find myself wanting to give in to your demands. After all, who wouldn’t want to hand over an extra cookie after such a display?
- College Costs Are Terrifying. I’m grateful you have no clue about money. If you understood how much college costs versus our savings, you’d probably wake up sobbing at night. Think of our Play-Doh stash as a metaphor. If we pooled together every bit we have, it would barely cover a semester at a decent college!
- I Adore Your Speech Quirks. I’ve mentioned before how I dislike baby talk, but when you try to mimic adults and stumble, it’s the cutest thing ever! I cherish your little lisp and your creative pronunciation. While I gently correct you, inside I’m melting with pride.
- Your Other Grandpa is No Longer Here. This is a tough one. I’ve shared stories about my dad, but thankfully, you’re too young to ask the tough questions. Explaining death is daunting, and I’m just not ready for that conversation. He would have loved you both immensely.
- There Are Words I’d Prefer You Not Know Yet. You know that catchy song we sing? I turn down the volume during certain parts for a reason. There are a few choice words that you don’t need to learn about until you’re much older.
- I Was a Picky Eater Too. I spend a lot of energy encouraging you to try new foods, mostly because I don’t want you to end up like me, who survived on a diet of peanut butter sandwiches. I hope you’ll explore a bit more than I did by the time you reach your teenage years.
- I’ll Eventually Return to Work. I know you don’t grasp what “work” means yet. You may cry when I leave for the day, thinking I’m just hanging out at the station. But before you were born, I had a job too. Being home with you is the best, but there will come a time when I’ll need to return to work.
- You Are My Best Friends. I used to think it was odd when parents called their kids their best friends. But honestly, you two are way cooler than any of my adult buddies! Sure, I crave adult conversations sometimes, but your stories about school are pure gold to me.
For more insights into parenting and fertility, check out this resource. And if you’re curious about home insemination options, this link is a fantastic authority on the topic. For an in-depth look at pregnancy, you might find this Wikipedia page helpful.
In summary, parenting is filled with secrets, joys, and challenges. While we navigate this journey together, I cherish the moments we have, even the hidden ones.