As a woman of average size living an ordinary life, I’ve wrestled with the insecurities about my body. My figure is no longer what it used to be; after two pregnancies, I’m left with stretch marks and curves that have shifted over time. When a friend mentioned that she was treating herself to boudoir photos for her upcoming 40th birthday, I was filled with a mix of intrigue and apprehension.
“I’ve always wanted to try this, and I’m not getting any younger,” she said enthusiastically. “These photos won’t be tacky—just tasteful and beautiful. Plus, the photographer is a woman, so it’ll be a comfortable experience.” Her confidence intrigued me.
Throughout my life, I’ve battled with body image issues. In my teenage years, I wished for larger breasts; in my twenties, I was convinced I had a “potbelly” that didn’t exist. By the time I hit 30, two pregnancies had added significant weight, leaving me feeling like a deflated balloon. I often find myself wishing I had appreciated my younger self more. Why didn’t I value my body at 25?
After much contemplation, I finally decided to book a session with the photographer. The worst outcome would be a few private photos that would never see the light of day.
On the day of the shoot, I woke up with a knot in my stomach, as if I were about to tackle a major challenge. My nerves intensified as I reminded myself that everything would be okay.
The makeup artist, who was around my age, quickly helped calm my nerves. Having done boudoir shoots herself, she offered posing tips and handed me a glass of wine, which I gladly accepted despite the early hour. Going from a bare face to a glamorous look with curled hair, false lashes, and bold eyeliner was exhilarating. My friend was already in the makeup chair, so there was no turning back now.
The studio was beautifully set up, resembling a chic bedroom. I’d brought several lingerie sets, a couple of heels, and casual tops. Initially, I felt awkward posing in my lingerie while the photographer and her assistant guided me into various positions. However, after switching outfits and seeing a preview of the photos, I began to feel more at ease. The lighting was flattering, and I couldn’t believe how good I looked!
Once the session wrapped up, I felt empowered and beautiful. Yes, my body had changed, but I still felt attractive and confident. We celebrated with a lovely dinner, and I went home with my false eyelashes tucked away. I hadn’t shared this experience with my husband or kids because, in truth, it felt like a personal gift to myself. If it didn’t turn out well, I could easily forget about it.
When I received the final images, I was overwhelmed with emotion. I couldn’t believe it was me in those photos—soft, elegant, and artful. My husband loved them and was proud of my courage to undertake such a journey. His words resonated deeply: “I’m just happy that you see yourself the way I’ve always seen you.”
And he was right.
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In summary, my boudoir photoshoot turned out to be a transformative experience that not only boosted my confidence but also reshaped how I view my own beauty. It was a gift to myself that I will cherish forever.