Almost 25 years ago, I joined a sorority. Yes, I was one of those girls, a genuine sorority sister from 1991. We were often labeled “bowheads,” accused of purchasing friendships, and became the target of countless blonde jokes and bimbo remarks. We were endlessly teased about our big hair, yet, despite all the stereotypes, I cherished every moment spent wearing those pastel pink and green Greek letters and being surrounded by some truly remarkable women who mentored and befriended me.
This fall, across more than 650 college campuses, nearly 150,000 young women will line up outside grand houses adorned with Corinthian columns. They’ll be popping breath mints and wiping away sweat as they prepare to make the best first impression on a group of strangers. Some may be the first in their families to go Greek, while others follow in the footsteps of mothers, grandmothers, and even great-grandmothers. Recruitment is akin to an over-the-top job interview, where personality, composure, and humor all come together in a brief, unscripted 15-minute conversation that might barely scratch the surface with “What’s your major?”
During that week, these potential new members (PNMs) will navigate from house to house, participating in “ice water, philanthropy, and preference” parties, hoping to receive a bid from a sorority by the end. To outsiders, this may seem outdated and superficial, possibly even disingenuous. In many cases, it can be. However, for me, as uncomfortable as recruitment week was, it remains a significant coming-of-age experience—a time when I had to step out of my comfort zone and find my people. And fortunately, I did.
My time in a sorority during the early ’90s offered invaluable lessons about life, sharing, and collaborating with a diverse group of personalities. I learned that no one looks good in white satin unless they’re getting married, that there’s always someone who shares your size, and that 35 closets are much better than one. I discovered that everyone has unique talents—you just need to help them find it. Some women radiate confidence and want to share it with you; the shy ones often surprise you. Being the top dog gets tiresome, and delegating responsibilities is key. I learned that offering pie can motivate people, and sometimes, those you least expect don’t wear underwear. Beauty queens apply their makeup just like everyone else—they just take a lot longer.
I’ve also learned that singing brings smiles, unless you’re crying—which is totally acceptable too. Your weight doesn’t define your personality. Life has its own timeline; it’ll come to you, even when you’re not ready. And nothing good happens after 2 a.m. unless it involves pizza, ice cream, or heartfelt conversations on oversized couches. Faking it is possible, but not sustainable. At times, the best advice is to remain silent. And of course, soap operas like Days of Our Lives are best enjoyed with a minimum of 15 friends. I realized that no matter the challenge—just like an app—there’s always a girlfriend for that. Now, 25 years later, I see that the promises and bonds we created have truly stood the test of time.
From the chaos of big hair, high-tops, and formal dresses, we’ve evolved into incredible women—circuit court judges, physicians, school leaders, and entrepreneurs. We’ve become cancer survivors, marathon runners, global missionaries, and philanthropists. We’ve started businesses, returned to school, and formed families, trading our Greek letters for even more impressive titles like CEO and MOM.
But when we gather again, even just a few of us, something magical transpires. It’s as if we turn back into our 19-year-old selves, laughing heartily and reminiscing about our wild youth, despite now being in our middle ages. Whether you were a Theta, Tri-Delt, Chi-O, Kappa, Zeta, ADPi, or DZ, throw us together in a dim room, light a candle, and play some nostalgic tunes, and you’ll see us swaying together, our shared memories flooding back. We look into one another’s eyes and share ten crucial words: “Thank goodness there were no cell phone cameras back then.” In the glow of that candlelight, we nod in agreement.
For those exploring family planning options, consider checking out other helpful resources like this post about DIY gifts or insights on fertility boosters for men. You can also find valuable information on IVF and home insemination.
Summary:
Reflecting on her sorority days, Melissa L. Fenton shares the joys, lessons, and lasting bonds formed during that pivotal time in her life. Through humor and nostalgia, she highlights the growth and achievements of her fellow sisters and the magic that happens when they reunite.