Yesterday, I did something I had always avoided: I brought my three kids along to my appointment with my therapist. Typically, I treat these sessions like I did my prenatal check-ups—dedicating that time exclusively to myself and my mental wellness without the added concern of managing my children. This was supposed to be a small oasis in my busy life, a moment where I could focus on my needs rather than worrying about keeping my kids quiet in a formal setting.
To be completely honest, I was also apprehensive about explaining to them why I was seeing a therapist. I dreaded the questions that might arise, like, “Mom, are you sick?” or “Why do you keep going if you seem fine?” I didn’t want to dive into those conversations because they made me feel vulnerable. It’s ironic, considering I openly share my experiences with anxiety and advocate for mental health awareness. Despite my advocacy, I felt a twinge of shame. I didn’t want my kids to think of me as perpetually fragile, knowing I’ll need these appointments as part of my ongoing journey.
However, I realized that my reluctance to bring them along wasn’t just about the hassle; it stemmed from a desire to shield them from my struggles, even though we often talk about my mental health. When my usual childcare plans fell through and time slipped away due to my children’s dawdling, I faced a decision: cancel the appointment or bring them with me.
Perspective plays a vital role in managing mental health. The hefty cancellation fee of $110 certainly influenced my decision to take the more challenging route, but it wasn’t the only factor. I understood that to truly challenge the stigma surrounding mental illness, I needed to let my children witness this part of my self-care. By doing so, it could help normalize seeking mental health support, not just for them but for anyone who might need it in the future.
My kids behaved remarkably well in the waiting room, holding doors for others and striking up conversations as kids do. They accompanied me during my weight check and medication review, even chiming in with their observations about my sleep patterns. Their innocent insights sometimes made me laugh—talk about a dose of reality! They also joined me in the therapist’s office, commenting on the comfy chairs and answering her questions. Their warmth, evident in the hugs they offered to the nurse and doctor, broke the ice in a setting that often feels heavy with unspoken anxieties.
I want my children to understand that seeking help for mental health issues is a brave step. Breaking down the stigma associated with mental illness starts by showing that it’s a normal part of life for many. I noticed that having my cheerful kids around seemed to lighten the atmosphere, easing the usual tension that accompanies visits to a therapist’s office.
Many individuals feel the need to hide when visiting a mental health professional, parking far away to avoid being seen. In contrast, no one hides when going to a pediatrician or an urgent care clinic for physical ailments. By fostering open conversations about mental health, we can shift this narrative and encourage a culture where seeking help is as accepted as visiting a doctor for any other health concern.
It’s my hope that if you or someone you know is navigating the complexities of mental illness, you will feel empowered to speak candidly about your experiences. This not only fosters understanding but also reassures others that it’s okay to seek help when needed and to support those who do.
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Summary
Bringing my children to my therapist appointment was a transformative experience that helped normalize mental health discussions within my family. By allowing them to witness my journey, I aimed to break down the stigma surrounding mental illness. Their presence not only lightened the mood but also reinforced the importance of seeking help. Open conversations about mental health can foster understanding and encourage a supportive environment for everyone.